A Second Chance Love Read online

  Table of Contents

  Legal Page

  Title Page

  Book Description

  Trademarks Acknowledgement

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  New Excerpt

  About the Author

  Publisher Page

  A Totally Bound Publication

  A Second Chance Love

  ISBN # 978-1-78430-232-0

  ©Copyright T.K. Paige 2014

  Cover Art by Posh Gosh ©Copyright September 2014

  Edited by Jennifer Douglas

  Totally Bound Publishing

  This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental.

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Totally Bound Publishing.

  Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Totally Bound Publishing. Unauthorized or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution.

  The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork.

  Published in 2014 by Totally Bound Publishing, Newland House, The Point, Weaver Road, Lincoln, LN6 3QN

  Warning:

  This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This story has a heat rating of Totally Burning and a Sexometer of 2.

  A SECOND CHANCE LOVE

  T.K. Paige

  Years after losing her husband, Kerri Johnston is surprised to find love again with the two men she never knew were there all along.

  Two years ago when Kerri Johnston buried her husband Caleb after a tragic car accident, his best friends Kyle and Jacob came to her rescue. Taking her back to their ranch with them, they gave her a fresh start and a friendship she desperately needed. But after her grief fades Kerri realizes her feelings for her two friends have changed and friendship isn’t enough.

  While Kerri knows that Jacob and Kyle play with women occasionally, she also knows that she could never live with being only a temporary fling to them. When Kerri makes the decision to leave because watching them from the outside is becoming too painful, she gets a surprise second chance at love. That is, if three people can work through the obstacles and misunderstandings that come with it…

  Trademarks Acknowledgement

  The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction:

  Skype: Skype Technologies S.A., Microsoft Corporation

  Xena: Warrior Princess: Studio USA Television Distribution, LLC

  Kindle: Amazon Inc.

  HGTV: Scripps Networks, LLC

  Jacuzzi: Jacuzzi Hot Tubs, Inc.

  Chapter One

  “Did you tell them why you’re leaving, Kerri?” Rebecca, my best friend since eighth grade, looked at me with concern. Then she looked pointedly at the plane ticket I held clutched painfully in my hands. “You figured out how you felt about them and what? You bought a plane ticket to leave three days later and didn’t even tell them until the night before?” She actually grasped the sides of her computer worriedly, I guessed since she couldn’t actually grab me. “This isn’t you, Kerri. Since when do you run? Why don’t you be honest with them? Don’t they deserve that much?”

  “You want me to tell two of my closest friends, who are totally in love with each other, that I am leaving because I can’t take being in the same house with them anymore?” I glared at my computer screen. Sometimes there were drawbacks to Skype—like my best friend, who was over eight hundred miles away, could still read my face so well I couldn’t get away with shit. “No, I didn’t tell them. They would be upset and I can’t take it anymore. It was different when I was just attracted to them. Or when I was at least lying to myself about that being all there was.”

  I sighed to myself. Jacob and Kyle had looked so worried about me, and they’d tried so hard to convince me to stay. “I just told them that Caleb has been gone for over two years now, and I need to find a life of my own. It’s the truth, Becs. I still miss him every day, but I want to find someone to love me again. I’m tired of sleeping alone. I am tired of being alone.”

  “Kerri, you already have found someone to love and you know it!” Rebecca threw her hands in the air. With her short red hair, green eyes and petite build, she looked like a fuming leprechaun. “You are in love with Jacob and Kyle. What if they could feel the same way about you? You told me they used to have relationships with women before you moved in with them. So you know they enjoy being with women.”

  “Yes, but it was only for a night or a few weeks at most… They have never hinted that they wanted anything long term.” I looked at Rebecca, fighting back tears. “I couldn’t be with them for only a week or two and then go back to being friends. And I can’t lose them. They are too much a part of me. They miss Caleb as much as I do.” And with that thought I realized why I was so afraid of reaching for what I wanted so badly.

  My late husband had grown up with Jacob and Kyle. All three had lived in the same small Oklahoma farming town outside of Guthrie. They were all only children, and had grown up together as close and loving as any brothers could possibly be.

  I confessed my real fear to her. “What if I tell them and I lose them? It’s not just them not loving me back, if I lose their friendship, I lose my last link to Caleb too.”

  “Kerri, you love them, you need to try.” Rebecca looked at me earnestly. “If you don’t tell them, and you move away, they will be gone anyway. You will pull away from them because it hurts too much. If you tell them, you may still lose them, but it will at least be because of the truth. You won’t have to wonder ‘what if’ for the rest of your life,” she continued gently. “But no matter what happens, you will never lose your connection to Caleb.”

  God, she was right. About Caleb. I knew that, but sometimes it made it so much easier to feel him when there was somebody who shared memories of him. Who loved him too. Kyle and Jacob could even share memories of him that I hadn’t heard. Sometimes, when they were telling stories, I swear I could hear Caleb’s booming laughter right along with ours.

  And I was already pulling away from them. Staying in my room more and more because the sight of them curled up together while we watched TV made me feel so lonely. My eyes would spend more time on them than on the TV while I wished I was snuggled up with them. All the times that I saw them kiss made me ache so much that I hid more and more.

  Rebecca smiled gently. “Kerri, I thought you were making a mistake when you, a California city girl, moved to their ranch, even if it is just outside Oklahoma City. I didn’t like the idea of you taking over as their cook and housekeeper after working your way up in a good restaurant. I hated to see you walk away from that and I was sure you’d regret that. I thought when the shock and grief of Caleb’s car accident was over, once you had time to process everything, you would move out to Orlando with me if you still wanted a fresh start. But I have watched you over our Skype calls. You are happy there, Kerri.” Her eyes turned fierce. “And when I have visited, each time I could see that your feelings for them had changed a little bit more. Don’t you dare walk away from them without taking the chance first!”

  Wrapping my arms around my stomach, I took a deep, shuddering breath. Could I do this? Take the leap
and risk the crash? Rebecca was right, I was already plummeting. Just because I was falling with a parachute didn’t mean I wasn’t still going to hit bottom. It was just slower. “Are you ready for me to show up on your doorstep, Becs? Because if they tell me no, I am going to show up as a blubbering mess.”

  “Always ready, Kerri.” She smiled at me. “But I don’t think that is as likely as you think. Go talk to them now.”

  A few minutes later I was looking at myself in the mirror, trying to believe there was a chance. I knew that they thought I was pretty with my dark brown eyes and long, wavy brown hair. I had decent figure even though I wasn’t stick thin, and I had hips. At a little over five and a half feet I was never going to be anything other than short and curvy. That took some effort to maintain so I didn’t cross over into chunky. And avoidance of cheesecake.

  I had never been the femme fatale type. That was a laugh. I’d met Caleb when I’d stood up at a home football game for our college team. I had gone off on a rant at the ref about what I’d considered to be an incorrect pass interference call. By the time I had caught my breath, there had been three men staring at me, and I had self-consciously apologized. They had all smiled and shaken their heads at me. Caleb had promptly asked me to dinner and introduced me to his best friends Kyle and Jacob. The four of us had been inseparable for the next four years.

  So no, feminine and seductive were not my natural state. The thought of trying to present myself to two men—two ridiculously, sexy, attractive men? If I was wearing my boots, I would be shaking in them.

  As I looked down, I sighed to myself over my clothes—cut-off shorts and a worn teal tank top weren’t exactly sexy either. Not that seduction wear was called for, but a casual sundress would’ve been nice. It wasn’t like I had that option though. I had packed everything except the clothes I was going to wear to leave in tomorrow. And as I thought about it, I realized that all my clothes were pretty much the same as what I had on. I had donated most of my clothing when I’d come out here, wanting a completely fresh start. It was a bit of a shock to understand I’d only replaced them with casual and sturdy items. Jeans and T-shirts were basically all I had.

  I didn’t look like any of the women they had hooked up with. Oh, God, was I going to be making a fool of myself? I had visions of Jacob, a gruff, giant of a man, looking at me with embarrassed, gentle eyes. I knew he would be horrified at the idea of hurting me. He was the one I was most afraid of rejecting me. I knew Kyle thought I was hot. I had caught him looking at me enough times with heat in his eyes. But he would never risk losing Jacob, and I would never want to come between them. And honestly, I wanted them both, or not at all.

  I took a deep breath to gather my courage and walked over and opened the door. When I found him on the other side with his hand raised to knock on the door, I don’t know who was more surprised, me or Jacob.

  His dark blue eyes widened as he hastily pulled his hand up to run through his curly black hair. I knew that gesture. He only did that when he was extremely self-conscious or emotional. It made me want to reach out to hold him. To give him a hug.

  “Kyle and I would like to talk to you… Please?” Jacob asked quietly.

  “About my leaving?”

  “Yes.”

  He looked like he wanted to say more but was afraid to. And that settled any doubts in my mind about whether telling them was the right thing or not. Forget my fears. They were my friends no matter what else. They had been there for me during the worst time of my life. They deserved my honesty about everything, didn’t they?

  “Okay, Jacob. Let’s go.”

  When he automatically stepped to the side so he could follow me, my heart clenched. It was just so Jacob. One of the small, gentlemanly gestures that were such an innate part of him that had I to steel myself for whatever happened. Becs might have been hopeful, but I was too afraid to be. How often did people get second chances?

  * * * *

  Wearing only his favorite faded blue jeans, like Jacob, Kyle stood next to the stone fireplace in the living room with a hand covering his eyes. His thick blond hair was pulled back in the short ponytail he preferred. I couldn’t keep from admiring his chest. He wasn’t as broad or tall as Jacob, but his muscles were just as well defined. When I came into the room he dropped his hand and searched my face with worried jade-green eyes. He hurried over to me and blurted, “Don’t go, Kerri!”

  I smiled at him and hugged him tight. “I don’t know if I can stay any longer… It hurts too much.”

  “Did I do something? Did we do something?”

  I looked up into his face. “No. It’s me. I need more.”

  “More what? You want to go back to work at a restaurant or something more like that?”

  I leaned into him and laid my head on his shoulder, savoring the feel of him against me as he hugged me to him. “No, I like working on the ranch. I like taking care of you and Jacob and the rest of the guys.”

  “Then what do you mean, Kerri?” Jacob came up behind me and put his hands on my shoulders. His voice shook slightly. “There isn’t anything we wouldn’t give you or do for you.”

  “You know that I will always love Caleb, right?”

  Kyle cupped my cheek gently. “Of course we do, sweetie. And so does Caleb.”

  “I‘m changing, Kyle. It’s like I’m waking from a bad dream.” My throat closed up as I fought back my tears. When Jacob turned me around to hug me, they started leaking out. “I’m ready to move on.”

  “Do you think that we don’t want you to be happy? That we would be upset if you were ready to move on?” Jacob sounded so tender and yet very sad too. “Is there someone new?”

  “Yes.” I could barely force the word out. I had lost Caleb. I didn’t think I could survive losing these two men who had snuck into my heart.

  Kyle made a small sound of pain and took a step back from me. I tried to pull away from Jacob, but he tightened his hands on my shoulders and growled at me. “Who, Kerri?”

  I froze. Once I said it I couldn’t take it back. Everything would change.

  “You are leaving us because of this asshole, whoever the fuck he is!” Kyle’s eyes were snapping with green fire as he started pacing, waving his arms around. “Who?”

  I watched the normally easy-going Kyle storm around the living room, my mouth agape in shock. I breathed his name, but he was so worked up he didn’t acknowledge my stunned whisper.

  “Kyle,” Jacob admonished him. “You need to calm down.”

  “Fuck calm! Calm hasn’t worked!”

  He raged at us and my jaw dropped as he stalked over to me. Then he was pressing me back against Jacob with a determined set to his jaw.

  “We tried your way, babe, giving her time and space, and now she is leaving us… My turn now.”

  Kyle slammed his mouth down on mine. When I gasped in surprise, he quickly deepened the kiss, thrusting his tongue in and I was lost.

  It was everything I had ever fantasized about. Every nerve ending in my body came to life as Kyle devoured my mouth, pinning me between two of the sexiest men I had ever known. Kyle ground his hips into me, his large erection pressing into my stomach, and I just caught fire. All tentativeness forgotten, I wrapped my arms around Kyle’s shoulders as I rocked myself into him desperately. I wanted to feel him rubbing against me. I want to feel him in me! He buried one of his hands in my hair, pulling my head to one side. I sensed his other hand wrap around Jacob’s neck. Pulling his head down toward us. I slowed my kiss with Kyle as I prayed that Jacob wanted this too.

  God, please! Let this happen! I felt Jacob resist for a moment. It was enough to make me stiffen, my hope dying as quickly as it had flared to life. I pulled my mouth from Kyle to protest. “No, Kyle. Jacob doesn’t think of me that way. Don’t force him.” My voice shook with tears as I tried to get away from them. Every hope that I had in my heart was dying.

  Kyle tightened his arms. “Babe, please. You have got to let her see, or we will lose her for sure.”<
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  Jacob gave a low groan and pulled my hips back into him. He shoved his lower body against me, and I jerked in surprise. He was larger than Kyle and rock hard. Then he growled in my ear. “You believe I don’t think of you that way? You couldn’t be more wrong.”

  He started kissing, licking and nipping up and down my neck, leaving me gasping as each of his actions set off ripples of fiery sensation that echoed all the way through me. His hands roamed up and down, grazing the sides of my breasts, which were swelling with arousal, nipples stabbing into Kyle’s bare chest as he pressed into me again and took possession of my mouth. All I could do was moan into the kiss while I wrapped one arm up around each of their necks, hanging on to them.

  I don’t know how long it continued like that. Every little move they made heightened the waves of pleasure that consumed me. Every little whimper or mewl from me was met with rumbles of hungry approval from the two men. It went on and on until it seemed like forever, but when Kyle pulled his mouth away from mine, I realized that it hadn’t lasted anywhere near long enough. I was aching with unfulfilled desire and even more at the thought that this might be all there ever was. I’m not ready for it to be over! I whimpered in protest and clutched at them, trying to pull them tighter to me.

  “Who is he, Kerri? Can he give you what Jacob and I can give you? What we have always wanted to give you?” Kyle’s voice was raw with pain. “Why can’t you see us?”

  “You don’t understand. There isn’t anyone else.”

  “Then why were you leaving us?”

  Oh, God, Jacob—big, strong Jacob who had always been a tower of silent strength for me—sounded devastated.

  “Because I love the two of you.” My throat was tight with tears. I had gotten a glimpse of what I had been yearning for, and I was so afraid it wouldn’t, couldn’t last. “I know you two are bi, that you have taken women to your bed, but never for more than a few weeks at the most… I don’t think I could take only having you both for a little while and then having to walk away. I would rather not know what I was missing and keep my friends forever.”